I have come to the conclusion that I spend more time by myself than I do with actual people (cat not included). I wonder if that means in the next season off my life I will be surrounded by people and begging for alone time. One thing if for certain (and I'm sorry I've repeated this many times before)... things are not quite what I expected. Take, for instance, the fact that I am sitting outside at eight o'clock at night in what has to be still close to a hundred degrees and swimming in humidity. I don't care. I've been inside air-conditioned air all day. I need to see life.
By the way, did you know that most cars that drive by my house are silver? Black probably follows close behind, but silver definitely takes the prize.
It's cloudy. Thunder teases me with rain and a few sprinkles even play the part well, but I seriously doubt rain is in the future. It's hot. I'm sweaty (sorry for the picture), but I just don't care. My husband is working hard, the kids are entertaining a new kitten nine hundred miles away, and I sit here thinking about what might have been. Not a good state of mind, I understand, it's just that sometimes I re-visit these things. I like going there although I know I can never stay. Things are what they are. God has a plan. I went to Walmart earlier in a car that has no a/c. My van is in the shop that will hopefully leave on Friday or Saturday providing we can pay the bill. Oh, we'll pay it. We always do. We're never behind on anything (give or take a few days). Life marches on.
And these cicadas are really loud. I'm half tempted to pull out the .38 just to liven things up. I won't, but it makes me chuckle just thinking about it. It might silence everything for a split second (not counting the ringing in my ears), but those insects and birds and squirrels would pick up right where they left off. No sense disrupting their night for my brief moment of entertainment. I guess every now and then we all have nights like this. Things will liven up once the husband gets home. Things will really liven up once the kids get home. Things will probably seem out of control once I have a job again. Yep. I know. Enjoy the extreme boredom, no one to talk to or listen to while I can.
I wonder if I could hit this fly with that .38. Nah... I would just have to explain the hole in the front porch then. I don't need that.
God does indeed have a plan.
2 comments:
Well, you have your readers to follow your musings. That's something.
I understand exactly what you mean about boredom... with nobody to listen or talk to. I too spend more time by myself than I do with actual people. So each day is a challenge. Over the past decade, three of my friends died. My best friend lives 200 miles away. So filling the void is tough. Yet without my solitude, I know I wouldn't be happy. I've adapted.
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