Fully Awake

Today promises to be a good day. A good friend of mine is anxiously awaiting the arrival of a new grandson and I am anxiously awaiting the text that says he has arrived. The happiest days are always the days when babies make their grand entrance.

I feel better today which is another reason why it's got to be a good day. Yesterday was spent in a Nyquil-induced haze (the husband's cure-all for any ailment) and last night I shook off his offer of another dose. No, thank you. I would like to function today, if you don't mind. But then again, all that sleep I got yesterday had to have helped. Something helped. Thank you, Jesus.

Moving Forward

The turkey is behind us and the tree looms on ahead. I feel the same way about that tree as I did the turkey... so not looking forward to it, but I so know it will turn out grand. I'm gonna kick start the decorating, though. That, some lights, and few rounds of Jingle Bells ought to get me in the mood. Besides, our girl already has her room decorated... tree, lights, the whole nine yards. If I don't do something quick, somebody is gonna look like a Scrooge around here and I promise you this, it won't be her.

The family is in for a treat tonight. The weather is in the high 60s and the grill is ready for action. While grocery shopping today, I came across a steal-of-a-sale on steak. No more leftovers for us. They (the family) have been patiently awaiting the mom-back-in-the-kitchen, I'm sure. We pretty much winged it all weekend after the Thursday afternoon feast. I think all that remains is a few stragglers in the sweet potato department and a healthy piece of pumpkin pie. I'm looking forward to some charbroiled beef.

Or grilled beef. You know what I mean.

I've been reading and crocheting and settling into that winter mode. With the sun setting shortly after five or so, it's hard to do anything but slip on the pj's and turn in early. I do look forward to this time of year (much cooler weather!) and yet I also miss sitting on the porch in the evening hours. Sunshine is good for my soul. On the plus side, though, the mosquitoes have vacated the premises. At least our budget is spared the expense of bug spray.

And although I am thankful that this month of thankfulness is almost over (yeah... you don't even want to see the blog entry I did on that one and then wisely deleted), I do want to shout out my own thankfulness:

Webcams.
Skype.
The whole techno thing.

I got to see my favorite girls (nieces & great-nieces) over the weekend. My parents, too.

I'm going to do everything I can to end this year on a positive note.

Just don't hold me to it. =)

My New Favorite Turkey

Another Thanksgiving has come and gone and as much as I was dreading it, I have to admit that it was beautiful. It was just the five of us as planned, but I'm no fool... I was very thankful to have a family for whom to prepare a meal. We sat down to a candlelit table shortly after the noon hour, the husband said a prayer that was heart-wrenching to me, and the kids dutifully answered the mom-forced question of What Are You Thankful For? The kitchen was spotless by two o'clock and the rest of the day was spent in comfy pants in front of the television. As we turned in for the night, the husband stopped to hug me and simply said, "Thanks for taking care of me today."

In my book, it doesn't get much better than that.

My New Favorite Turkey

a thawed twelve pounder, cleaned out, rinsed and patted dry

rub (inside and out) with kosher salt, lemon zest, and rosemary the day before

stuff with quartered onions (unpeeled) and lemons and fresh thyme the day of

brush with melted butter; sprinkle with kosher salt & pepper

roast (uncovered) at 450 for forty-five minutes

kick down to 325 and start checking temperature after the first hour or so

rest for a good twenty minutes

Happy Thanksgiving (Then & Now)

According to my Thanksgiving Week Plan (yes, I really do have one of those on my fridge) I should be setting the table and baking pies by now. Oh well. It can wait. I became slightly distracted by our now-working computer while I was cleaning the shelves above the desk. Good thing I haven't made it to Pinterest yet... I might never make it to the kitchen.

Instead I found myself dusting a framed picture of my brother and me at my wedding and thinking back to times long gone. It was a Thanksgiving Week such as this one twenty years ago that my husband and I had what could loosely be referred to as our first date. Basically we ran into each other on a Friday night and the rest is history, but the timing of that chance meeting is rather unique, not to mention a good reminder that God always has a plan.

That was my first holiday (not counting the Fourth of July and Labor Day) that I was away from my family. I was in the Air Force, in the states, but still too far from home to make the drive. To say I was depressed and homesick would be putting it lightly (gee... I haven't changed much, huh?) and I was not looking forward to a holiday feast on base. A supervisor of mine took pity and invited me to share a Thanksgiving meal with his family. I took him up on it and ended up making it a sleepover. They had small kids, I was like a big kid, and the stash of Disney movies took us well into the night. Later that evening, by now a Friday night, we all went out for dinner and that's where I recognized somebody I thought I knew. Like I said... the rest is history.

You know, I hated not being home that year and yet I was right where I needed to be.

There's not a whole lot more I can say to that.

Happy Thanksgiving to my family who will be together this weekend.
My parents. My brother and sister in-law. My nieces and great-nieces.

Happy Thanksgiving to my friends, both near and far.

Happy Thanksgiving to the family who shares these four walls with me.
You are so worth all the cooking and baking that's about to take place.

It's time I got started.

An Unsolicited Plug for Ted Dekker and Barnes & Noble (although a few royalties sent my way would not go unappreciated)...

One of my favorite books- a book I always go back to and have reread too many times to count, is Heaven's Wager by Ted Dekker. He was one of my favorite authors at one time and still is to a point. His newer stuff is a bit... well, strange (for lack of a better word) and I abruptly abandoned him a few years back when he joined the vampire bandwagon... nonetheless, his earlier work has forever captured my attention. Heaven's Wager is part of a The Heaven Trilogy (or The Martyr's Song Series) that also includes When Heaven Weeps and Thunder of Heaven. I had hardcopies of all three books at one time, but during some reckless, pointless cleaning spree a year or so, donated them or gave them away to friends or some other ridiculous, not-so-well-planned lame action of mine.

As luck would have it, this series came up an excellent e-book offer through Barnes & Noble (see link below). I wouldn't be surprised if Amazon offers the same thing. Trust me, it's well worth the thirteen bucks and change it takes to download:

"Three GREAT Books For One Decent Price," says Angela.

What's to love about Heaven's Wager? It's a modern day story with the spirit of Job from the Old Testament. It's a moving reminder that God is at work in all things, even when it seems He has left the building. It never fails to encourage me.

There is no neutral ground in the universe:

 every square inch, every split second,

 is claimed by God and counter-claimed by Satan.

~C.S. Lewis

I know my entries can get downright depressing sometimes. Trust me, if it weren't for my parents, who also happen to be my biggest fans, my writing would probably drift a little farther to the dark side. I can struggle with wrapping my mind around what my spirit knows to be true. I don't think that's necessarily a character flaw; I just think that's who I am. I am a sinner saved by grace. I live in an upside-down world. I am just like you- I just don't sugarcoat it with fairy dust and rainbows.

Oops. There I go again. The husband says sarcasm may be the end of me one day. He's probably right.
Read the book. Tell me what you think. I'll do my best to keep my smart remarks to myself.



And as a postscript, to whoever has been backtracking and reading old entries from this rambling journal of mine, thanks for coming back. It might be my mom or a friend I just met or that faithful reader from Israel... whoever it may be, I have noticed. I know I could pinpoint you (they make an app for everything, you know), but I kind of like the mystery of it all. Remember, what my life lacks in reality, I make up for in my mind.  =)

Keeping The Foolish Out Of My Writing

A few days ago I wrote a somewhat poignant entry regarding the many, many thankful (facebook) updates I have been scrolling through- it was Day 16 at that point. I thought better of what I had written (like I usually do) and decided the wisest thing to do would be to not publish it. There is, afterall, a proverb for this very thing:

A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions. Proverbs 18:2

I write alot of things that never make it to the publishing button. I've been asked on numerous occasions to write a book (something my ego loves), but I never get far with it. What in the world would I write about? I've tried fiction- love to read it, hate to write it. I can't keep the characters straight and I'm bored with myself by the second chapter. I've tried non-fiction, too, but there is nothing out there that fascinates me enough that I would want to devote a book to it... that's why I go to a library. So what does that leave? An auto-biographical book-of-my-opinions type of thing. I'm pretty sure that publication would rest dead in the water.

I did write a short book years ago entitled Proverbs 31 for the Real Woman (or something like that). I never knew what to do with it, though, and have since noticed that that theme is severely overused anyway. Actually, that particular manila envelope full of typed pages is kind of fun for me to read now. I was a fairly new wife and mom when I wrote it and full-to-the-brim of that funny thing called hope. Oh, I still have hope (I wouldn't be here if I didn't), but my hope today is edged with a whole lot of truth,  I guess. I have my faith, but believe me... if I were to write that thing now, I am certain it would read differently.

Hey. There's an idea. Maybe I should do that. It could be sort of a before and after thing.
Before the end of your twenties. After the reality of your forties. Marriage. Kids. Daily wrinkle cream.

But then again, I wouldn't want to scare the young people.

Happy & Sad (Don't Know What Else To Call It)

Picture this:

The horseshoe drop-off area at your kids' high school.
Your teenage daughter dressed up for professional day to earn extra credit.
Her boyfriend walking by at the exact same time your mini-van drives up.

Keep in mind this is the same girl who typically wears a camouflage jacket and jeans and boots on any given day. She is now in a skirt and heels and looking very professional. As she recognizes the boyfriend walking up in his own camouflage jacket and jeans and boots, her only response is,

Drive, Mom! Drive!

Oh, the things that make me laugh.

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We lost a member of our extended family yesterday whose passing came as such as surprise- I mean, the events leading up to it were so unexpected, my head is still whirling from it all. I suppose it's good for us all to  be reminded from time to time that life certainly is fleeting... we never know when our day may come. I know I have been looking at my own close family in a brand new light. A renewed appreciation. My heart aches for the unexpected tragedy of it all.

Life is a balancing act of the laughter and the tears.

May your laughter side always weigh more.

Take A Walk With Me

Do you ever daydream about stuff that is so far out there, it's somewhat relaxing (and fun) to conjure up scenarios in your mind that you know could never happen? I typically do this kind of daydreaming at night when I've got other stuff on my mind. For some reason, picturing myself in the craziest of circumstances- descending the steps of a private plane, for example- eases my mind and helps me fall asleep. It only takes a few minutes of pure ridiculous-ness to knock me out (and yes, I know ridiculous-ness is not  a word, but I bet you know what I mean).

The husband had no work today. I am still without work. And the oldest was sent home due to lack of work. Just think, it hasn't even been a full week since the election, but we won't go there. Instead, let's go to the river where the beauty of autumn beats any night-dreaming I may do.

This is how I spent my morning.

Just When You Thought I Was Out Of Hair Stories...

I come up with another one.

I was the only one in the house today when I left for church. I changed my shoes twice, added another layer of hair spray, and grabbed my Bible on the way out the door. I made it through one stoplight when the thought occurred to me that I really didn't want to go. Driving through three more stoplights, I made a right when I should've went straight and headed back to the house. I swapped my nice, dark green sweater for a Falcon t-shirt and an old black cardigan and popped a chicken pot pie into the microwave. I fixed up a baby shower gift for later today and flipped on The Brady Bunch and wondered what the Lord might be thinking.

You know, I've never pretended to have it all together.

Anyway.

The daughter made the decision to cut her hair yesterday. Technically, she made the decision some time ago when she began growing her hair for the sole purpose of cutting it one day. That beautiful hair is now in the form of a ponytail waiting to be mailed to Locks of Love in honor of her own battle with alopecia areata. Seeing as how I've still got the ponytail of the middle waiting to be mailed, we'll probably just make it a dual mailing event. One thing's for sure... this family ought to be saving some money on shampoo and conditioner and drain cleaners.

And yes, she loves it.

No regrets, Mom, she said leaving the hair salon.



Not a bad way to live.

My Thoughts On The Election, Steam Mops, and Those Eggs That Didn't Hatch

The Election.

Sheesh. Can I just say I'm glad it's over? My candidate of choice did not make it to the Oval Office and I have grave concerns about the man who currently sits in that seat, but... well, assuming all went according to design in terms of our electoral process, this is a democracy in which we live. I remember thinking Bill Clinton would usher in the end of the world with his second term. Granted, the current guy makes Bill Clinton look good to me, but hey... life and arguments and unemployment shall continue on.

Steam Mops.

There is something therapeutic about the steam of a plugged-in mop. Vacuuming and cleaning in general can help clear my mind, but when a dirty hardwood floor falls prey to steam and a good squirt of OrangeGLO for Hardwood Floors... well, let me just say that I feel rather accomplished right now. Oh, I know by the time the kids roll in and supper is finished and the nightly snack is consumed those floors will have lost the gleaming luster they hold at the moment, but for now, I am at peace.

Those Eggs That Didn't Hatch.

If you're lost on this one, back up to the last post (it had to do with cake, I believe). Whatever eggs I heard crackin' were not meant for me. I shut down on life-as-I-know-it for a good twenty-four hours, I guess. Even big girls need time to recover. Like the husband said, though, I'll do what I always do: Get Back Up. Probably the only ones who have a clue what the husband and I are going through (in terms of finances) are my parents and if they say I'll be all right, well then, I will be all right. Between them and God Almighty Himself, this thing can only end on a positive note.



Even another term of Barack Obama can't change that.

The Last Thing I Need Is Cake

This is what I keep telling myself as the offer of pound cake lingers in the air. I've never been one to play the weight game. I have no idea when I last stood on a scale. My jeans have always been the determining factor on where I stand as far as to eat the pound cake or not to eat the pound cake. Right now I'm pretty sure the jeans would agree with the mirror that the pound cake can wait. Besides, I'm really not that hungry. I can wait, I think, till lunch.

Maybe.

(And the fact that I was asked how I felt about substituting for a PE class should not be a sign to me at all. Right?)

The things that make me laugh.

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I wrote that a few days ago. Something happened before I got around to actually publishing it, though. I was going to ramble on about how I got to see my mid-western nieces via the webcam the night before and how that made me cry when the end button was clicked and how I get so darn homesick for my family far away. The cake incident was only a little humor to mask the tears. Oh, it happened and it made me laugh (if only to myself). Then the PE substitute thing came along which really made me chuckle. I'll tell you, there are times when I would testify that I hear the Lord laughing right along with me. That was one of those times. I have no idea what He is up to, but I'm betting it is the last thing I would have thought of... He's a genius like that.

So anyway, things might be a-changing. I have learned, however, not to count my chickens before they hatch. I'll not count 'em yet, but the sound of crackin' eggs are in the air.

And if that's the best idiom I can come up with, I better quit while I'm ahead.

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Oh,

The oldest is riding a motorcycle.
The middle looks like a body builder.
And the youngest has a boyfriend.

Life never stands still, does it?